Please begin by clutching your iPhone and availing yourself of a Monster Meter.
This thoughtful and much-needed item claims on iTunes that it can offer "undeniable proof that there are no monsters under the bed." Well, now. The truth is that monsters can leap from any given nook, cranny, or, in one movie I happened upon, granny. So Monster Meter had better be efficacious in every corner.
You might think that this app is a very shallow way to fool your child (or yourself) into believing there's nothing untoward toward the window sill. However, Monster Meter promises four monster detection technologies, each seeming to offer a different emphasis on the axis between levity and gravity.
There is, for example, a Green Meter, which the makers describe as "playful, yet serious." But then there's the Metal Meter, something that is described as a "more serious looking meter for serious monster finding".
The makers emphasize that Monster Meter is designed to help your kids feel safer by seeing on an iPhone screen that there are no otherworldly gorillas in their midst.